Is this the right decision

by Tia
(Strum,Wi,Usa)

OK. Me and my child's dad whom I dated for 3 years, broke up in Feburary of this year! It was too much for me. He cheated and broke my heart by saying he wasn't in love with me just had love for me. I asked if we could go to counseling to try and help us. He said no. I gave it a month and nothing changed we broke up on my child's birthday party later that night because he felt the need to go and get drunk. I felt alone and scared and didn't know what else to do.

I was already doing the majority of the parenting, etc. I started seeing this guy probably 1 and 1/2 months later and it just didn't feel right! He has been dating his (gf) Shannon for about 6 months and I mean I didn't hate her. We started getting along talking about when he's coming again and what not, then it just started going down hill.

She went and got my son's first hair cut; didn't mention anything to me about it til they dropped him off! Second, I told her when we first had a sit down not to be posting pictures of my son on her (fb) which she went behind my back and just blocked me so I couldn't see the album and others could!

She sends me rude texts just instigating things trying to be my son's mother I still love the father I always will I told him I was thinking about trying to work things out and he told me he would love to and that he would change I just don't want to jump back and have me and my son get hurt again!

Comments for Is this the right decision

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The Other Woman
by: Ask Sara

Wow! God bless you! This is a lot to deal with.

My question is...where is the dad in all of this?

If he is still with this woman he needs to be putting the brakes on her behavior. As the child's mother you deserve respect; and certainly not harassment. He needs to comply with your also need to be ground rules, and he needs to be sure she does as well.

If he is with this woman and talking to you about getting back together, I would challenge him to make an independent decision about each relationship. He either wants to be with her, or he doesn't. If he chooses not to be with her, he needs to end the relationship.

Once that relationship is over, the two of you can discuss your options. In the meantime, give a good amount of thought to what you want from a relationship. Discuss those thoughts with him.

Affairs of the heart are in no way easy, but the stakes are high for you and your child, so think things through.

Remember...you are incredible!

My best,
Sara

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