my crazy life

by tiffany

I'm 22 I have 2 children a 2 1/2 year old and an 8 month old. My soon to be ex-husband and I where together for 7 years. Which means we started dating when I was 14 years old. T and I where very much in love and had been through a lot together. When I was 18 I got pregnant with my daughter and he was ecstatic. Probably more excited in the beginning then me. About a month before her birth he became very moody, and at that time he was diagnosed w bi-polar disorder. When my daughter was 6 months old the stress became too intense and we split. We got back together and got married and had my son. Again when my son was 6 months old we split up, but this time it was due to his drug use and alcoholism. He has only seen my children twice since we filed for divorce 2 months ago. Both only for about 15 minutes and the first time was in passing. I am tired of doing it alone. I'm tired of being the only responsible one. And I'm tired of being ashamed and embarrassed to tell my true story.

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my crazy life

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Nov 25, 2012
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starstarstarstarstar 		You AREN'T Alone - You Can Do It!!!!
by: Ada

Hon, I was in similar shoes over 26 years ago. It's tiring, frustrating and I can feel the exhaustion in your words.
There is NOTHING to be ashamed or guilty over! You've got two great wee ones and although it's not easy ways to move forward.
Like Sara said, TAKE TIME FOR YOU! Cry, relax, read a book or just rest with your feet up for a few minutes. You are human and no you needn't be WonderWoman although at times it will feel that way.
You can do NOTHING regarding how your ex behaves with the kids. My ex walked completely away less than 2 years after the divorce. The girls haven't seen or heard from him since.
My girls all have degrees, have wonderful partners and enjoy a full life.
Your kiddos will be fine with lots of love, you being for you what you need and for them what they need.
Keep going to Sara's page on FB and her website. It will definitely help and wish so much there had been a Sara for me when I was dealing with what you are.
Blessings and hugs from afar. Ada
Nov 24, 2012
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starstarstarstarstar 		Hang in there...
by: Ask Sara

Bless your heart!! I hear ya! I know that exhaustion. Just plain tired of doing everything on your own. No one to discuss things with, no one to share the burden with, no one to go to for a hug when you feel overwhelmed, and embarrassed because things didn't go "right".

Mental health issues are tough for everyone. Your husband is still young, and boys are a little slow sometimes, so he may appear at some point as a father in your children's lives.

In the meantime, you have to take care of you and your babies. You sound wise beyond your years, so I have no doubt you can do this. I would suggest counseling if you can manage it. If there are no funds for this, consider clergy.

Here are some things I want you to know:

1. Your story is not unusual. Men leave for various reasons. I wish it weren't so, but it is.

2. You are strong. God has great things in store for you and your children.

3. Rest when you need too. If you need to sit down and relax, have a good cry, walk in the park...whatever; just do it.

4. You are not alone. There are nearly 12 million single moms in the US, all doing and feeling the same things.

5. It's not your shame. You cannot control your husband. The fact that he is not around is his issue. You don't need offer explanation or apology.

God Bless...and Good luck to you. Know you are incredible, and you are raising fabulous children!
Nov 24, 2012
Rating
starstarstarstarstar 		Hang in there...
by: Ask Sara

Bless your heart!! I hear ya! I know that exhaustion. Just plain tired of doing everything on your own. No one to discuss things with, no one to share the burden with, no one to go to for a hug when you feel overwhelmed, and embarrassed because things didn't go "right".

Mental health issues are tough for everyone. Your husband is still young, and boys are a little slow sometimes, so he may appear at some point as a father in your children's lives.

In the meantime, you have to take care of you and your babies. You sound wise beyond your years, so I have no doubt you can do this. I would suggest counseling if you can manage it. If there are no funds for this, consider clergy.

Here are some things I want you to know:

1. Your story is not unusual. Men leave for various reasons. I wish it weren't so, but it is.

2. You are strong. God has great things in store for you and your children.

3. Rest when you need too. If you need to sit down and relax, have a good cry, walk in the park...whatever; just do it.

4. You are not alone. There are nearly 12 million single moms in the US, all doing and feeling the same things.

5. It's not your shame. You cannot control your husband. The fact that he is not around is his issue. You don't need offer explanation or apology.

God Bless...and Good luck to you. Know you are incredible, and you are raising fabulous children!

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