My son is asking about his Father

by Dezirae
(San Jose CA )

How do you tell your 4 year old son that his father is not apart of his life by choice?

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When dad is absent
by: Ask Sara

Hi Dezirae!

Thanks for the question. This is certainly a tough spot. I was in the same spot with my son. I told my son that his father didn't think he would be a very good dad, and because of this, thought it was better that my son stay with me. Because I got a bit of child support, I was able to add that his father sent money to help out. (My son's father showed up when my son was 10 years old. I was very glad I used this explanation. It made it much easier on my son when he was faced with deciding if he wanted a relationship with his father. They have now been friends for 15 years.)

Do your best to share the positive information that you can. I know it breaks your heart to see your child confused when there is a grown up who has made a conscious decision to be absent.

However, you cannot control this man's behavior. All you can do is support your child as he seeks answers.

My best to you!
Sara

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